MY BACKGROUND
I coach ambitious men to confidently and effectively approach, attract & form relationships with beautiful, feminine women, in casual daytime environments (like high-streets, coffee shops, art galleries, private events, and gyms/health centres). Beyond this, I have developed a vast personal & professional network of high-achieving men and women, as well as a strategy and tools for my students to do the same.
I have helped over 140 men (and counting) to find beautiful, loyal girlfriends, who support them and their vision.
I have helped over 600 men (and counting) to get their first dates from women whom they met sober, in the daytime, in the real world (no apps/clubs/bars)
I have helped over 8,500 men (and counting) to come up and talk to a girl they like, for the very first time.
When I was 19 years old I experienced my first shattering heartbreak. My girlfriend of 3 years had been seeing someone else, and everyone seemed to know about it, except for me. If you've had this experience, you know that your heart is broken twice, first by the loss of the person you loved (or thought you loved), and then by realising you have lost part of your own identity to them.
This experience was extremely painful, but I learned that pain can be the greatest catalyst for evolution, and out of my pain I solemnly committed to learning everything I could know about attraction, dating and relationships. I would never be so blind and naive as to let something like this happen to me again, I would never feel so weak and so helpless again.
So I dove in to the rabbit hole, and found out about men who would simply walk up to women in the daytime and have fun & flirty conversations, and that's what I committed to learning for myself. The first woman I approached was beginners luck. She was nice and spoke with me for 5 minutes by the bus stop. After that, I was hooked. I started cold approaching women every day in Nottingham (a city somewhere in the middle of England), and I started to see real and obvious improvements. I started going on more dates than my better looking/more popular friends, and I received more attention at parties and events (I used to sit invisibly on the periphery...).
I stopped attending my university course altogether (I still haven't seen any evidence of my 'History of Art' degree) and I found a job as a 'Social Mentor' for students with learning difficulties (ASD's/ADHD) at the university. I worked as a 'foot-soldier' for a well respected Applied Behavioural Analyst who managed the students' social skills education. I quickly learned how to write syllabus and create structured improvement in the lives of the students: attending lectures, dinners, and events with them, and developing a personalised strategy and action plan for their cases, and then tracking data on how they were developing & improving their social outcomes using the syllabi I created.
As my students were aged between 18-21, and socially unsuccessful, there was a strong (burning) desire to meet women and date. High testosterone levels mixed with a high degree of social anxiety or aversion caused a great deal of suffering, and so I was (literally) paid to take my clients out to parties, social events, and cafes to help them speak with women and build relationships from scratch. This was (obviously) the perfect way for me to spend this time. I loved the work, I loved seeing my clients change, and I loved knowing that I had helped them, and how unlikely it was that I could be in this position. I learned a lot...
By the age of 23, I was in demand as a freelance social skills and dating coach, and had already worked with many of the better known dating coaches (and Pick Up Artists) in that 'industry', some names you may have heard of, which I won't mention here. It became obvious to me that approaching pretty women and being able to have these spontaneous conversations which led to many incredible romantic/sexual relationships was not even the full extent of the benefits.
I began to develop this strong, stable internal confidence (self-esteem), as well as the more obvious external confidence (charisma/charm) as a result of watching myself become the competent man that I never percieved before I started talking to strangers. I watched myself evolve from a shy and overly agreeable young adult, into a confident, charismatic and attractive man over the course of 2-3 years. I discovered how to integrate these skills I had learned for myself, in to the lives of my clients, permanently.
So that takes us to the now, 11 years after I told the girl at the bus stop she was 'pretty', and my clients range from London-based Investment Bankers to Bali-based Angel Investors, with the odd struggling student here and there... What stays consistent is the process. I help every one of the to: A) approach and attract the women they never thought they could have, and B) Build the sorts of friendships and social circles which I have been so lucky to find, with men who are genuinely at the top of their game, strong, kind and honest. Whilst always maintaining the sacred balance of Wealth (current & potential), Health (physical & mental) and Love (family, friends & lover/s)
To understand whether I might be a good fit to help you out and see if there's alignment, here are some of my core beliefs:
MY BELIEFS ABOUT MEN:
- I believe that every heterosexual man wants to know that he is worthy of a worthy woman's love.
- I believe such men also deeply want to fall in love with a worthy woman.
- I believe modern men have been let down by their education systems, which did/do not teach invaluable practical skills: basic communication principles, practical psychology, behavioural change, evolutionary biology.
- I believe these education systems instead use outdated teaching methods and often prioritise impractical/unusable information which leave young men underprepared & confused in adulthood
- I believe that the majority of fathers failed/are failing their sons by not actively helping them to understand these same skills, and it's not because they are 'bad', it's because their fathers were the same.
- I believe that these failings are a tragic waste of wisdom and a cause of great suffering in men & women.
- I believe men are increasingly less able to endure discomfort, and embrace adversity and challenge, and that this poses an underestimated & significant risk to the well being of all humans.
- I believe that men are at their best (and most satisfied) when supported by strong-willed, productive, emotionally stable (masculine) men, and compassionate, caring, and empathic (feminine) women.
- I believe that every man has the potential to elevate his circumstances and transform his life, and his reality as an individual, if he decides first that he can, and then that he will.
- I believe in the process of masculine mentorship: that there is definite value in the sharing of specific skills, knowledge & wisdom, from one man who has acquired them, to another man who has not, but desires them.
- I believe that most men's suffering (in the 'developed' world) results from lack of clarity about what he should do next (controllable), and not from an innate/immutable circumstance of birth (uncontrollable).
- I believe that radical (unstable/unbalanced) societies result primarily from the failure of men to correctly embody and enact their masculinity.
MY BELIEFS ABOUT MASCULINITY:
I believe that masculinity is composed of a set of principles (mind) and not physical reality (matter). I believe those principles can be understood as follows:
1) The first principle of masculinity is Values, and every man should define his Values before anything else. (find my personal Values here).
2) The second principle of masculinity is Vision. Once he has defined his Values, he should use them to construct a Vision of the future that he intends to move towards.
3) The third principle of masculinity is Action. Once he has defined his values, and created his vision, he should develop a plan of Action towards the continuous realisation of his Vision.
4) The fourth principle of masculinity is Stability. Once a man knows his Values, Vision, and has a plan of Action, he must be able to manage his emotions & actions so that he can remain on the path that leads toward his Vision.
5) The fifth principle of masculinity is Responsibility. Once a man has understood and stabilised the first four principles of masculinity, it is his Responsibility to share the principles he has acquired with men who need them, and share the consequences of his evolution with with a worthy woman/women who will benefit from him. Thereby he spreads the value/goodnes he's acquired for himself with others (if this is in accordance with his Values and Vision, and if it's not, I don't know how you got this far...)
My mission is to live by my values and to follow the principles of true masculinity, and to share the wisdom I have acquired with the men who were once where I was. I truly want to see humans flourishing, and I know that's my vision, and I'm working towards it, one man at a time. If you're somewhere along the same path, or at least not perpendicular, we might be a good fit!
My Values
Courage
I have the quality of mind or spirit that enables me to face difficulty, danger, pain without reacting to feelings of fear.
Positivity
I am predisposed to take an optimistic view of events or conditions and confident in favourable outcomes.
Leadership
I willingly adopt the responsibility to guide or direct the actions of an individual/group when required or favourable to do so.
Integrity
I adhere to a set of defined moral and ethical principles; soundness of moral character; honesty.
Compassion
I am sympathetic to those less fortunate than me, and I will make sacrifices to alleviate their suffering.
Responsibility
I hold myself accountable for my own circumstances, and own my share of responsibility for the wellbeing of others/future generations.
Vision
I create vivid mental images/models of future circumstances, desirable or undesirable, so that I can aim for or avoid their eventuality.
Perspicacity
I am highly perceptive and tend to understand nuances and patterns throughout the world around me. I walk through the world with my eyes open.